Saturday, July 31, 2004
Free Entertainment Of The Third Kind
I love "Overheard In New York," a wonderful site by Morgan Friedman I check daily for funny and bizarre dialogue overheard around town. Best of all are hilarious title/responses Morgan thinks up for each entry. Here are recent samples:
1. How About "We Don't Try to Conquer Europe"?
German tourist: You can't smoke inside and you can't drink outside. What the hell do you people do in New York City?
2. Swing Low Sweet Chariots
Teen girl #1: I hate you. Your boobs are always so cute and perky!
Teen girl #2: Yeah, but when I'm not wearing a bra, they're like...down to my navel.
3. Sausage Fest Y2K4
Man #1: I am getting ready to throw my annual party soon.
Man #2: Dude, just remember to invite women this year.
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Friday, July 30, 2004
It's A Beautiful Day... and Help Is On The Way... We Democrats now have our marching songs, courtesy of U2 and the Whatnauts. Add them to your I-Pods!
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From last week’s Onion, my favorite feature, “What Do YOU Think?"
Question: “Researchers recently said that the chimpanzee, hunted for meat and threatened by deforestation, could be extinct in 50 years. What do you think?”
Answer 1: "Oh, boo hoo. They had their chance."
Answer 2: "They're being hunted for meat? Are chimp fajitas any good?"
Answer 3: "Well, I say it's one less species who will masturbate in public. Good riddance!"
Answer 4: “As a poacher, whenever I catch a chimp, I just throw it back. I'm after the tastier marmosets."
Answer 5: "What?! Oh, chimps. I thought you said 'chicks.' Shit. Wow. For a second there... fuck."
Answer 6: "Crap! We'd better remake The Barefoot Executive now, before it's too late."
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Question: “Researchers recently said that the chimpanzee, hunted for meat and threatened by deforestation, could be extinct in 50 years. What do you think?”
Answer 1: "Oh, boo hoo. They had their chance." Answer 2: "They're being hunted for meat? Are chimp fajitas any good?" Answer 3: "Well, I say it's one less species who will masturbate in public. Good riddance!" Answer 4: “As a poacher, whenever I catch a chimp, I just throw it back. I'm after the tastier marmosets." Answer 5: "What?! Oh, chimps. I thought you said 'chicks.' Shit. Wow. For a second there... fuck." Answer 6: "Crap! We'd better remake The Barefoot Executive now, before it's too late." this entry's permalink
Thursday, July 29, 2004
Girl Drink Drunk
My French friends safely arrived, so we headed to Regional Thai Taste to celebrate their visit and our two broken elevators : - ) Lively colors on a red background predominate, creating a bright collage of decor, cuisine, and Girl Drinks. Of course, Girl Drinks the exotic, multi-colored beverages flavored by fruit, powered by rum, and adorned with plastic mermaids and folding umbrellas. I only get drunk drinking Girl Drinks. Yes, I am Girl Drink Drunk. : - ) Quote of the Day
"Working with Julie Andrews is like getting hit over the head with a valentine." - Christopher Plummer (Canada's most brilliant theater actor of the 50s and 60s, who regrets that he'll be remembered for playing Captain Von Trapp in the film he refers to as "The Sound of Mucus." ) : - )
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Wednesday, July 28, 2004
Two jet-lagged guests, two broken elevators... ...and a partridge in a pear tree.... But I was a good friend and helped them carry their suitcases to the freight elevator, now the only alternative to the stairs, until they either fix elevator 1 or finish the renovation on elevator 2
This is Christian's first NYC visit, and will be Denis' first San Francisco-Vegas-Natural Parks visit when we head west a week from Friday... It's now 4 in the morning Paris time, they've just conked out and I'm about to do likewise. Cheery-o
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This is AT&T® 23rd Street...
...Next stop, Microsoft® 14th Street?
Bewitched, broke, and bewildered, New York's transportation authority MTA is planning to plug their $1 billion deficit by seeking corporate sponsorship of subway stops and even transportation hubs! Which is more disturbing, a $3 subway fare or boarding a train at Reebok® Grand Central Station? I guess I'd have to choose the latter, groaning, rather than incresae the already heavy burden on NYC's low-wage earners. NY Times had a good article on this yesterday, too.Fun facts: 1) More Americans ride NY's MTA in 11 weeks than take airplanes in an entire year. 2) Every 3 years NY's MTA moves the entire population of the earth - 6 billion rides!
Spot quiz - e-mail me your guess of how many women senators we have, how many women in the House of Representatives, and what percentage of state legislators are women... I'll post the closest guesser, and the actual answer, on Friday...
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Whirr. Whirr. Time does fly! Denis arrives tonight! Susan Sontag's gonna get me... Yesterday as I crunched numbers I pondered the implications of photographing strangers. I had been taking increasing pleasure in catpuring all the spontaneous oddity I encounter every day in digital photos and posting them here. But am I also violating these people, stealing their images to make fun of them on my blog? "To photograph people," Sontag said, "is to violate them...It turns people into objects that can be symbolically possessed." I'm not sure how I feel about this issue, I'm still digesting. Quote of the Day:
"As a rule, I am very careful to be shallow and conventional where depth and originality are wasted." - Lucy Maud Montgomery, writer
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Tuesday, July 27, 2004
Nail-rific!
I spotted this lady on the subway last night, sporting foot-long curlicue gray fingernails adorned with stripes and other patterns, on one hand only. Throwing shyness and courtesy to the wind, I grabbed for my camera and snapped. Photography really makes you tune in to the world around you, which in New York is filled with oddity and wonder.Denis and Christian arrive from Paris tomorrow night! From tomorrow to Labor Day, continuously, I'll either have visitors, be on vacation, or both. I've split my vacation into two one-week pieces, bracketed by weekends. I head west with Denis and Christian for the first leg, Aug 6-15, to search for America's soul on a meandering route from Utah to San Francisco, stopping at four national parks and Las Vegas. My Mom arrives the day I return, and I leave one week later (TBD, probably Europe and driving a stick shift) while she and her friend Harriet stay at my place and enjoy a NY holiday. Can you remember all that? : - )
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Monday, July 26, 2004
Quote of the Day:
"And how old would you be if you didn't know how old you were? " - Ruth Gordon, actress (Harold and Maude, Where's Poppa) ...I was frequently told in the 80s that I resembled Harold. : - )
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"And how old would you be if you didn't know how old you were? " - Ruth Gordon, actress (Harold and Maude, Where's Poppa) ...I was frequently told in the 80s that I resembled Harold. : - )
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Sunday, July 25, 2004
Sunny End... On my way up to Briarcliff to visit my friend Deborah and her family, sunbeams pierced the clouds, and sunlight bathed the remainder of the day. Highlights included a delicious and inventive home-cooked meal, and meeting Joshua, Deborah and Elias' 5 1/2 year old son. With my nephew Danny 3,400 miles away in Arizona, I feel kind of nephew-deprived. : - ) Joshua likes to cut up for the camera and he moves very fast, but I did manage to get a good natural shot (picture left). I'm going to learn true photography, really I am. This is the year! Six Feet Under, my favorite TV show in 20 years, had been falling off this season, but I'm glad Brian talked me into watching tonight. It had moments of dead-on emotional truth and felt much more organic. Nice to have it back
Two of my favorite current groups are the Bees (60s psychedelia) and the Hives (garage rock). Those who've known me a while will appreciate the irony of my liking groups with these names. : - )
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Outside Inside
It's an overcast Sunday, but I'm going to visit friends in Westchester, nice contrast to a solitary Saturday... I took these pictuers of outdoor and indoor art on Thursday:
This rusty coil graces the green island dividing Park Avenue:
This shiny gold vertical squiggle greets me at work every morning between the escalator and the elevator:
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