Friday, July 30, 2004

From last week’s Onion, my favorite feature, “What Do YOU Think?"
Question: “Researchers recently said that the chimpanzee, hunted for meat and threatened by deforestation, could be extinct in 50 years. What do you think?”

Answer 1: "Oh, boo hoo. They had their chance."
Answer 2: "They're being hunted for meat? Are chimp fajitas any good?"
Answer 3: "Well, I say it's one less species who will masturbate in public. Good riddance!"
Answer 4: “As a poacher, whenever I catch a chimp, I just throw it back. I'm after the tastier marmosets."
Answer 5: "What?! Oh, chimps. I thought you said 'chicks.' Shit. Wow. For a second there... fuck."
Answer 6: "Crap! We'd better remake The Barefoot Executive now, before it's too late."

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